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Ask Gwen “I Went to a Party and Lost My Boyfriend”

Dear Gwendolyn:

I was in a relationship that I felt was okay.  We went to a dance and I did not want to dance off the song that was playing.  When I said no, he started dancing with someone else and continued dancing off/on with this woman.  On my favorite song, he was on the floor with this woman.  I had to tell him to turn around now and dance with me.
When the dance was over and we were leaving, he pulled this woman to him and whispered in her ear.  When he was confronted, he told me I was “fired.”  We live in the same complex.  He is dating the woman he met at the dance.  Whenever she comes to visit him, she makes it her business to park her car next to mine.  I cannot believe all of this breakup was about me not dancing when he wanted to dance.  It doesn’t make sense.

Dear Gloria:

Yes it does.  When you didn’t want to dance, he did.  Let me tell you this:  When a man wants to go somewhere or do something, then go where he wants you to go.  You didn’t lose him to this other woman.  You gave him away.

Men are strange and although you had a point, you really should have gotten on that floor not waiting for a particular type of music to play. I suggest you should forget what happened and look for someone else.  I do not advise you to try to regain the relationship.  As to the other woman parking her car next to yours, ignore it.  At one stage of my life I would have told you to break out all her windows and puncture all her tires.  I’m more mature now and don’t react rational like a high school girl.

Gloria, don’t feel too downhearted.  Just because you see other couples dancing means nothing.  Sometimes a man will dance with his date putting his arms around her neck and be – winking his eye at the woman dancing behind her.

Got a problem, email Gwen at: or write to her at P. O. Box 10066, Raleigh, N.C.  27605-0066.  To receive a reply, send a self-addressed stamped envelope .Visit her website at:

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